The Toilet-Teaching Video Series is a six-unit process that leads you through the process of teaching toileting to children and youth with challenging incontinence needs. This video explains the sequence of the videos.
A full transcript of the video appears below.
Hello and welcome to the Vermont Continence Project’s Toilet Teaching Video Learning Series for parents and caregivers. My name is Chayah Lichtig. I’m an occupational therapist and I am the director of the Vermont Continence Project. The Vermont Continence Project is an interdisciplinary team working to make toileting easier and more successful for children and youth. Our team of consultants includes a dietitian, a nurse, a child psychologist, and me—an occupational therapist. We also have the support of a team of professionals around Vermont. We’ve studied the science of continence and understand many of the common challenges that people face when trying to move toward their child being dry and clean.
Our project is based in the Center on Disability and Community Inclusion (CDCI) at the University of Vermont. CDCI is what’s called a UCEDD, or a University Center for Excellence in Developmental Disabilities. CDCI is home to 34 full-time staff and 31 projects. The Vermont Continence Project is proudly funded by the Vermont Child Health Improvement Program, known as VCHIP.
We feel it’s important for you to know the beliefs that guide our work. We think that continence is important for a person’s dignity. Continence is a worthwhile goal that improves a child’s well-being. Even when someone may have a medical issue or disability that stands in the way of full independence, we still believe in supporting them to their abilities.
We believe that people want to be continent. Over the years, we’ve worked with many parents who see that their child seems not to care whether or not they are dry or clean. And we’ve observed that with appropriate support, most people gain skills over time, and they’re proud of their continence.
We believe that incontinence is a stressor for not only the child but also parents. We understand that when your child is not continent, there may be limitations to what you feel you can do as a family, or you may feel pressure from others or financial stressors. Some of what we’ll address is how to make life easier now, even if your child is not fully continent yet.
And we also believe that there is a science to later or atypical toilet learning. Many toilet teaching approaches depend on the same few recommendations. And for children and youth who are struggling with continence, many of these ideas don’t work—or they don’t even apply. Fortunately, there are systematic ways to understand and support your child. And that is what we hope to teach.
Have you ever heard that expression: “A problem cannot be solved by the same mindset that created it”? If you’ve been dealing with your child’s incontinence for a long time, it’s possible you’ve been managing it the same way for a long time. Our hope for this program is that we give you some directions and guidance you might not have considered.
You might be wondering why this video series is for you—the adult. If your child’s been incontinent for a long time, you probably want us to tell you what your child needs to do—or even just tell your child what to do. But this program is based on the premise that the best person to teach your child is the one that sees them every day, who knows them best, and can model and try all different methods of support. And that person is you. We’re here to guide you as you learn and try new things and hopefully create the space for your child to then learn and grow.
We know that there might be more than one reason that your child isn’t continent—and that there might be many different reasons that their incontinence is a stressor for you. Maybe you and your child are fighting about going in the bathroom, and our content on parenting and behavior will stand out for you. Maybe your child sits on the toilet for a long time but nothing comes out—and you’ll want to dive into why accidents happen. We hope the videos offer you insight and support on many fronts.
While you might want to jump right to a topic that seems particularly relevant for you—and you can—I hope that you will follow the videos in the sequence in which we present them. I assure you, we set them up the way we do for a reason—because they strategically guide you through changing and resetting your child’s toilet learning program.
In the first unit, we start with a shared understanding of how continence usually develops and how it can go wrong. And we’ll also focus on things to do to take the pressure off of everyone as you begin the process. This is really important, and I hope that you’ll give it special attention.
In Unit Two, we are going to talk a lot about digestive health—poop and constipation. And if this is something you’ve never heard about before in relationship to incontinence, we hope you’ll listen closely. And if constipation is an old-hat topic for you, I hope that you’ll still give it plenty of time, because it turns out it’s not understood as well as folks might think it is. And then we’ll also keep looking at that dynamic between you and your child, and how that might be relating to their incontinence.
In Unit Three, we’re going to talk about how to address those issues you might have identified through medication, nutrition, and other strategies.
In Unit Four, we’ll start rebooting that toilet teaching process. We want you to work smarter—not harder.
In Week Five, we’ll look at what you know about your child and how that might affect and customize your toileting program for them. We’ll also dive deeper into nutrition.
And finally, in Unit Six, we’re going to look toward the future—what to do next, and how to manage relapses or setbacks.
We think these videos could be helpful to anyone whose child or youth is struggling with their continence. We have a lot of experience with children for whom parents just aren’t sure why their child isn’t continent—and these videos, I hope, will give you insight.
These videos could also be helpful if you’re trying to get ahead of common pitfalls in toilet teaching. We also think these could be helpful if you’re trying to teach toileting to someone with a disability. The full inclusion of persons with disabilities in their toilet learning is a central aim and is represented throughout our work.
And finally, if you’re a provider who is working with parents or families managing any of these issues, we hope that these videos will benefit you and the folks that you can share them with.
Right at the beginning of this process, I think it’s a good time to remind yourself that this won’t all happen at once. It will take time for you to develop a new understanding of your child’s incontinence and make changes based on that.
It will take even longer for your child to feel those shifts and feel safe and ready to make their own brave changes.
I encourage you to think about all of this information we’re going to give in this program like seeds. We’ll offer some to you, and you take the time to nurture them and see which ones grow.
Throughout this series, you may be asked to do extra tasks, try new things, and even question your own beliefs and assumptions. I’ve included a picture of a plant growing through a crack in concrete to remind you that we can be tender and resilient through change. And as you go through this process, we’ll be here to help.
You’ve got this. Thank you for your time.
The information contained in these videos is for informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional health or medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified healthcare provider.
Next resource:
Elimination Basics
